Many of you are amazed by the lack of news recently and we thank you.
If Zoe seems less irritable as we have decreased steroids in the last few days, also less agitated thanks to her medicine, Zoé remains extremely tired and any movement becomes harder, whether it's to hold the head, turn it or do yes or no. Communication also becomes more difficult while our questions often remain unanswered but we are getting there. Zoe is still laughing once in a while which is so lovely.
Zoé's left eye remains half closed..
What does Zoe know about her condition? What does she understand? I often ask her by looking at her, watching her, and remain silent while I'm afraid to say too much with my questions.. but last night, when I was filming her, Zoé was deliberately watching and checking the ceiling. I asked her if she was looking for / wanted something, . Then after a while, I asked if she was afraid. Are You afraid? " from the dark? " no. " from a monster? " no. " from a bad dream? " no. And there, bearly to ask the question, " to go? " and Zoe to nod. " are you afraid to go to heaven? " Ditto. The fact that she didn't hesitate tied my stomach at one time and yet I knew it was the opportunity to have / be able to talk to reassure her. And everything goes so fast in these situations where we realise that we're not really prepared but we're launching " don't be afraid.., it's a magical place.., there will be grandma mono.. and A lot of people you know.., you'll see.. " in my head, I thought of our other grandmas side dad but I didn't want zoé to believe that there are only elderly people in heaven. I also almost said our Annabelle and Kaleigh but I was afraid to scare him. Zoe made me a big smile to the word "Magic", it made me all funny and it had to see myself on my face because she started staring at me looking at my eyes one after another, like To see if I was sad and cried. Oh I wanted it so much, but there it's like I knew, I felt I didn't have the right and instead, I made her a big smile by stroking her hair to reassure her. I asked him if it was better and Zoe to nod again. I was both shaken and relieved of a big weight.
Tomorrow afternoon Monday and until Thursday morning, we will return to Naomi house. We hope to be able to enjoy the pool, after which Zoe will certainly want to go home. In any case, we will be well well looked after, that's certain.
Let's just pray that the state of Zoé stabilises as long as possible.. ❤️